Hopelessly Romantic

Experiencing love is not a Eureka! Eureka! moment of life. The feeling catches you unawares and by the time you realize it, you are already head long into it. So there is not one moment which you can pick as the moment you fell in love. The reason why I bring this up is to introduce you to the class of individuals who mistakenly search for that special moment and in the anxiousness to do so unwittingly end up playing an Archimedes in Love by proclaiming their love at every killing smile that they catch hold of.

I first fell in love quite early in life after learning about the virtues of seizing opportunity as an early mover. It remained my first love until I learnt an English word called 'infatuation'. From then on, I classify any feeling of attraction to the opposite sex under that category. One, because I want to avoid going through the motions that people go through while in love. Two, because I really don’t know how to go about it and most importantly because I sincerely value opinions that rate me as a disaster in everything besides coming up with awful practical jokes to trap unsuspecting victims. In that sense I have tremendous respect for these gutsy guys who at least listen to the call from their hearts and go out to pursue what it asks them to do.

I have known quiet a few of these hopelessly romantic folks from my school, college and now my professional days and I have often marveled at the commitment that these guys show to these sometimes non existent relation in the hope that it would some day materialize. I had once tried to play a love guru to a first timer (my college room-mate, read Parth!) and failed miserably, so I don’t resort to suggesting them ways to woo their love interest. However, I still love to give them a patient hearing and that forms the basis of this post.

In case you are wondering about what I did to fail miserably as a love guru, I made my roomie write a ‘supposed’ love letter that had references to a robot, remote sensors and some such silly engineering stuff with an aim to create a stud image for him. His 'She' replied back with a mail that had references to words that you won’t even find in Barron’s GRE word list and her impeccable sentence structuring and control over language could put GMAT’s verbal section to shame. Since we were not able to comprehend half of the mail, the love life of my shishya was ruined before it could take off the plane. I am sure he still carries that grudge against me. Parth, if you are reading this, lemme request you to give me another chance if it is in sight to redeem my pride and your glory and do something about this dil pe rakha hua bojh.

Coming back to what we began with, sighting these romantics at heart is not as difficult a proposition as sighting an alien in the holy land of Bihar. Here are a few cues to help you figure out this variety:

Polished look alternating with a disheveled look every now and then

They look polished when they try to catch the attention of the target. This continues for a few days during which this specie tries all possible things under control to win her over. The disheveled look takes over when they think they are already in love but the girl doesn’t give it a damn! The cycle repeats each time a new target comes within striking distance.

Starting to act secretive

The mobile phone is the biggest weapon that these guys possess. After a few public interactions (call it date for their sake) with a girl and post exchanging mobile numbers, they act swift in taking the relationship to the next level. SMSes are exchanged and love blossoms. Please note that this exchange could be two sided as well and that makes me think whether these girls are really so silly not to get the vibes - "Main to tumhe sirf ek dost samajhti thee". Anyways, once these exchanges start, all idle talk with friends about the girl are met with deadpan expressions or a wry smile at most. He doesn’t ever forget to leave his cell phone unattended. All goes well and looks under control. The relationship does start to take shape and long chats follow at nights until the girl drops a bomb one day saying that her family has chosen a boy and she can’t go against their wishes. The disheveled look returns and he doesn’t really care where his mobile is for a change.

Acting sensitive

You will not realize why your abuses and slandering jokes are no more taken in the right spirit. They either stop reacting to it or issue an ultimatum. “Don’t you dare do anything to tarnish my image in front of her.” Point taken!

However, this is a transitional phase. Since these guys switch allegiance every season, you will find them back on track soon after the courtship period is over and they are back to business looking ahead in life and in search of their next tryst with romance.

Everything I do, I do it for you

Don’t be surprised to see them trying out a radically different look or doing something weirdly unique to please her. I have seen a fairly dark acquaintaince of mine buying green contact lenses to look different. Some outspoken romantics at heart go that extra mile to make sure that the love of their life understands it. An approving nod makes them go ga ga and it’s understandable. But at this point the hesitancy of trying to be something out of your skin gives way to a swagger that bellows – “Don’t you know that I am happening?”

All stays rosy until someone up there decides to play games and by a quirk of fate, they get back to where it all started and the cycle is repeated. After all Saccha pyaar saal mein ek baar to zaroor hota hai.

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
('If' - Rudyard Kipling)

I salute the infallible spirit of these people.