The Mirror Reflection

I don't know why I am writing this. Maybe the worn-out looking face of 'A', the guy I met the other day on my way back to home in the bus, has a role to play here. This is about the phases of life that I thought this 'A' might have gone through until the time he came and sat beside me in the bus. So bear with me as my imagination runs amok!

Phase I: Birth - The arrival

A's Dad works as a Bank officer, living in a rented house, growing bald with worries of saving money to marry off A's elder sisters B and C. Now that A's father finally has a boy, he has decided to stop having any more children.

On the day of his birth, A's dad was busy filling out ledgers in the bank as it was the financial year close. But to give him company at the hospital were his grand parents, loving sisters(one of them still a toddler while the other one went to school) and some other relatives. The news of his birth was a cause for joy. His grandfather shelled out money for 2 kgs of shuddh desi ghee ke laddoo. This meant that he was really happy and in a pleasant mood. A's uncle thought of introducing his girl friend to him then and there to seek his approval for their marriage but wisdom prevailed upon him.

There were celebrations and A's father felt the brunt of it. All his saving plans went awry with this recent splurge of money. But he did not mind.

Phase II: Childhood - The upbringing

'A' is good at studies so they decide to send him to a good english medium school. Daddy dearest goes to drop him to school everyday and then pick him up. Two elder sisters sit in the rear seat and A stands in the front on their 1986 model LML Vespa scooter. But this does not last long. The school being quite far away from home, it was decided to send them to school in a bus. It was a costlier affair as the bus charged them individually and did not grant any concession but they could do with it keeping in mind the rosier future that they had seen for their son.

A's Dad worked hard and so did his Mom to bring up the kids in the best way they could. A's Dad ensured that they never defaulted while paying their school fees except during the last month of the financial year. That was a month when tax deductions were made from his salary and poor A's parents had trouble keeping the finances in check during that time.

The kids got new clothes on every major festival and on their birthdays but they were not as lucky with getting toys as regularly. A board game of scrabble or carrom was a coveted possession for these kids in their childhood. They got a chance to buy a toy of their choice( there was no need to tell them about any money constraint, they were matured enough to understand it) when they performed well in their annual examinations or when Dad got some increment/bonus.

By the way did I forget to mention that A's uncle was married by now, with his college girl friend. There was a lot of hue and cry over the whole episode but A's uncle was relentless and the family finally gave its approval. They thought that it was better to concede defeat than let the family dispute get messy with people living all around making their own judgment over the matter. They pretended to show that they had changed with the changing times.

School life drew to a close for A and he came out with flying colors implying that he was to pursue either engineering or medical. These were the only options he was given. He chose to go ahead with engineering so he chose Science subjects. By this time, A's eldest sister had already completed her Bachelors and was ready to be married off.

Phase III: Education - The Survival

'A' cleared an engineering competition. His Dad felt that his hard work had paid off and would soon yield high returns. Marrying off B had caused a major dent in his savings and he still had C to marry off. Besides the expenses on the health care of his ailing parents made things worse for him. 'A' knew what responsibility he was carrying on his shoulders. He was matured beyond his years. His Dad took educational loan from a bank to pay for A's higher education. He slogged hard at his college. Competing with the nerdy and brainy guys who too had come with similar hopes and aspirations as him was never going to be an easy task. He survived and landed up with a plum job after 4 years of hard work.

His uncle too was now pretty much settled and had two kids. Both still went to school and looked upto 'A' as a role model.

Phase IV: Professional life - The Struggle, The Success, The Transition

'A' worked as a software professional in a major MNC headquartered in the Silicon Valley. They paid him good bucks. Right in the first year of his professional life, he started earning more than what his Dad brought home after 22 years of service. It heralded the dawn of a new life style for 'A' and his family. He was soon packed off to the US where he made more money and soon got his sister married off.

A's grandparents were no more with them and but that couldn't reduce the expenses. The money brought in a considerable change. 'A' got a car for his Dad. He pampered them with gifts he brought from US.

The Software Industry had changed the life styles of a lot of young middle class folks. This led to the creation of a new class of individuals who liked to be called the Upper-middle class. The money that they got curbed the recurring thoughts of being just another 'cyber-coolie'. The job did not require much of creativity but they still hung on. The happiness in seeing the joy on the face of their family on purchasing their first car kept them negotiating the rut that they had entered into. They managed staying away from home, compromised on living life on the terms of their employers and pretended to be happy.

As he sits beside me, I think 'A' is still making the transition. He's almost there. He has been in US for the past 3 years and has made some money. Now he would be going back to get married to his girl friend who stays in India. 'A' proposed the girl after seeking some practise lessons from his uncle when he last went to India. His uncle was celebrating his 25th marriage anniversary that year.

Though 'A' pretended to be all happy, I could still see him wearing down. His face said it all and then he turned towards me and asked with a smile - "Hey man why do you look so tired?"

What? Did I too look tired? I thought that I was happy or was I pretending to be? Why the hell did he ask me the same question that I wanted to ask him? I felt a seizure in my mind and then I thought that with a twist in the tale here and there, I too could have been what I was making out 'A' to be. I couldn't really answer him then. I needed to take a long hard look at myself in the mirror to get the answers I guess...not just me, a lot of us need that, don't we?